Although I didn’t think I was going to make it, I actually did it! I wrote twenty thousand words in July, completing my goal for Camp NaNoWriMo.
I’m so proud of myself. This is the most I’ve written in years and the first time I’ve ever completed NaNo. I still have a lot of writing to do until this book is finished but I’m actually feeling motivated to keep writing and it’s such a strange feeling. I’m so used to wanting to write but not being able to. A lot of credit goes to my friend Dominica who has spent the entire month doing writing sprints with me and being this books number one fan. Without her, I probably would have given up weeks ago.
My total word count as of last night is 3454 with my goal at 17000. I know I’m doing pretty good and I should be proud of myself but it’s getting harder and harder to stop myself from feeling badly about what I’m writing. I haven’t even started writing for the day and it’s almost over. I’ve got maybe 4 hours left to write my count for the day but I just keep staring at where I left off, completely unsure of myself and my ability to tell a cohesive story. I always hear that reading helps but a lot of the time it just makes me feel worse. Because I don’t think I’ll ever be that good.
To sum it up, I’m feeling bad about myself and my writing. But I’m trying really hard not to. It helps to have someone writing with me who can help me get through slumps.
A friend and I met up yesterday to go over plots and notes before we started writing together at midnight. Everything went pretty smoothly and I even hit my daily goal before morning. Of course, it is only 550 words so it wasn’t exactly very hard.
But then I realized that I had written myself into a hole.
It never fails, honestly. My biggest problem is that I obsess over getting everything right the first time, making it perfect the first time. I want to go back and edit. I overthink every single word I put down. I can’t get myself to keep working and worry about everything else later.
I had to start over. I had to just do the scenes that are in my head, keeping me from moving on. I had to stop worrying about making those scenes connect to the next and it seems to be working so far.
Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for me.
I’ve decided to participate in Camp NaNo next month! I’m going to be working on an idea I have for a romance novella that’s going to be cheesy but is already a lot of fun to write.
I actually just finished writing the (first draft) of the first chapter and I’m really pleased with how it’s going.
I’ve been so caught up in trying to write my novel that isn’t titled or anywhere near done that I’ve kind of lost my love for writing. I think taking time to work on something else will definitely help me out of the little writer’s block dump I’ve been stuck in for a while now. The problem is that I want so badly to write this novel and have it come out perfect that I’m starting to hold myself back. Second guess my decisions and ideas. It’s frustrating and disheartening.
It’s been several years since I’ve used Wattpad – to read or to get my writing out there. I made the decision today to post the romance novel as I’m working on it and then edit it later with any feedback that I get. It’s just so hard to write without editing. I have to stop myself from doing it and from going back over what I’ve written.
The idea that I might actually make some progress this year is incredibly exciting. This feels like I’m going in the right direction.
Are any of you participating in Camp NaNo? Tell me about what you’re writing!